Well just over a week since I got back (I can't believe it) and I'm already counting down the days till I'm off round the world. Should be first week of September, but I'm meeting up with Mx in July so will confirm dates and make itinery up then. Hoping to hear back from my boss soon about the sabbatical, but at the moment he's just plying me with more work and hasn't mentioned anything since I got back from South Africa.
Aaah!!!! South Africa all I have now are memories (but what memories), 5 small handpainted animals and a mini zulu shield. Having had time to reflect I can hopefully do the place some justice here.
South Africa is the best place I have been to by a mile. It was good for so many reasons, but mainly because we got out there and did stuff. On arrival in Durban we could have been in any country in the world and it's not until you get out and visit places that you really appreciate where you are.
I think people's biggest fears about South Africa is security. I never felt in any danger the whole time I was out there, apart from the BBQ in the middle of the game reserve. It is noticeable however, that every house and hotel complex has high walls with spikes on top. They are also adorned with signed warning of armed response. You see a lot of security cars driving around, but really I never witnessed any trouble and I'm sure you'll be fine in Durban / Uhmlanga provided you are sensible. There are obviously places where you'd be ill advised to go to, but I can say the same about Farnborough and Aldershot. Other parts of South Africa are different as far as security is concerned from what I understand.
One of the first things that strikes you is how cheap everything is. I've explained about accomodation, food and drink earlier in the blog, but really everything is cheap. The biggest expense is the flight. After that I can guarantee you a cheap, but superb quality holiday.
The resort was much like any other I've been to, without the Brits aboard and the German towel fest. It basically a lot quieter than most holiday resorts, but has all the amenities you could ask for and is completely laid back. I've always felt that holidays in Spain etc. are like being in England, but sweatier. They serve a purpose and are great for families, but if you want something different, but normal, then here's the place. It's nothing like a club 18-30 holiday either. There are not enough holidaymakers and the locals are to security conscious. That's not a bad thing. It's nice not to see a McDonald's for 2 weeks, but there were plenty of Wimpy's and KFC's.
The people I met were probably the best bit. It's obvious that South Africa still has a long way to go to get over apartheid, but the Blacks assured us that progress has been made. All the Blacks we met were obviously wary of us white folk, but after we were nice to them then they came out of their shells. They loved the simple things, buy them a bottle of beer (25p) and you've got a friend for life. I thinks all the lads gave away their football shirts and some their trainers. Things that we all take for granted. After getting to know them a little, they always wanted to sing and dance for us. The cleaners sang on the day we left as did all the zulu football teams that we played against.
The White South African's were a different story, the older one's were fine, but some of the young one's we met had huge chips on their shoulders about having to work harder than a black man to get a job. There were a few exceptions, but you've just got to understand that they come from a different culture to us and they're taking a little while to get used to it. In truth there is a bit of positive discrimination going on, but I think they'll get the balance right eventually.
I think racism occurs in all walks of life, but over there it seems more endemic. The Blacks seem to accept that it goes on, which seems bizarre to me, but I guess it just shows how far the country has come since apartheid and how much better it is for the blacks now. There was no better example of this endemic racism than at Tiger Tiger. It costs whites 20 rand to get in and blacks 50 rand. The 3 non whites in our party of 23 were treated no differently by us, but were the only non whites in Tiger Tiger other than the glass collectors. Equally there are all black clubs over there, but complete integration of the cultures seems some way off.
It is very noticable that all the people you see working, whether it be Road worker, petrol pump attentdant, Glass collector, Waiteresses, taxi driver or cleaner, are all black. In fact the only white people you see working are the restaurant Manager's and the Bar Maids. What is nice to see though is that they are always busy doing something. There seems to be a little job for everyone.
The Weather (well it's got to come up at some point) was great. It was always in the high 20's or low 30's, but was by no means oppressive, unless you are trying to play football. There was always a nice breeze. The biggest change in temperature came when we went to the mountains when there was a noticable nip in the air in the mornings. When I arrived back in London the heat was way to oppressive. I hate the English hot weather. It sucks.
On driving around the country it is amazing how much nothingness there is. In a 300km drive up the country we passed 1 petrol station. The main roads are toll roads and basically empty. You occassionly drive past a little group of houses. From the outside they appear to be breeze block structures, some plastered, most not. God knows if they've got electricity or water. I don't know how they survive without those essentials and of course Sky Sports.
I was very fortunate to have been part of a tour and very lucky that so much had been arranged for us. I know that I wouldn't have done as much as I did, had it not been arranged, but I did appreciate it and it certainly gave me the appetite to want to explore more on the RTW adventure. To that end I need to say a few thank you's.
Alan and Janice - coordinated the tour from the South Africa end.
Enna and Cenna - from the Licorna Apartments (where we stayed) for putting up with our antics.
Abiding memories of the Guys.
Schultz - Team Manager - Wherever the action was Schultz was. Always first in the bar and normally the last out. One of the first night crew, unlike Jeff. My only regret is that I trapped his fingers in the minibus window. Sorry and we'll have to go for a beer in Fleet sometime to make up.
Paul Dale - Coach - Daley organised the tour from the UK end. He ensured that we got to see as much as we could and it is to his credit that we achieved all that. His coaching was also a real eye opener and I know that my game certainly improved (not that hard) over the fortnight as I'm sure everyone else's did. Maybe Fleet Town Reserves or some Sunday hackers will reap the benefit.
Scanners - Scanners was the unfortunate member of the party who had his wallet and trainers knicked through no fault of his own. It made the choice of end of tour present very easy though. He was also one of the drivers and a tremendous bloke to boot. He's not a bad centre back either.
Indy - Indy earned the nickname of 'Long John' from the locals. I think it was his incredibly gangily legs that did it, but he had a terrific tour in the centre of midfield. We shared a beer or 12 (actually it was more like shooters) and he helped Ally return here bed from the balcony (Mug).
Joe - Goalkeeper extraordinaire. He spoke just like Johny Vegas (Stivs) which made me laugh. Unforgettable moment - shitting himself on the 6th tee (no really).
Ally - Physio - Where do I start with this fines list eating bird. She was sick every time she drank, but she is without doubt the best and most thorough physio I've met. Did a fantastic job, although my hands still hurts (she never did get round to looking at that).
Sammi and Jo - Schutz's girlfriend and her sister. Came out to enjoy themselves and that's exactly what they did. Members of the first night crew, unlike Jeff.
Frank - Anything to add Frank. Yes, keep the ball simple. That was the phrase that Frank, our captain, commonly used. Real nice bloke, but I've never known a vegetarian get food poisoning before???
Jeff - Legend. Owner of the worst suitcase in the world. Up for a beer at any time, until its time to leave for the club (as proved on the first night). Another decent guy, although he didn't appreciate my comment comparing his wife to a warthog. Sorry, again!! Enjoy your retirement old fella.
Danny - Danny's tour lasted 10 minutes and I don't think he touched the ball in that time. It didn't dampen his spirits though. The falling off the table onto a wine glass and getting 20 stitches in his leg did slow him for a short while though. Another member of the first night crew, unlike Jeff.
Rob - Scottish (but we wont hold that against him, Hi Mum!). Fellow singer of 'Flower of Scotland' in Porky's. Very broad scottish accent as well. Never seen a bloke wriggle so much when he was asked by an England fan (thug) why we had the Union Jack on our shirts and not the cross of St. George. This bloke could have asked anyone on the tour, but had to ask the scottish member of our contingent. Rob tried his hardest not to open his mouth and reveal his scottishness. Had a great tour up front, until it was unfortunately cut short by concussion. Walked around with one eye closed for 5 days after that.
Mitch - Famous for returning to the UK with a broken nose, thanks to me. To be fair for a 42 year old he had a great tour at centre back. I think after the first 10 minutes of the first game he wanted to be substituted, but we just didn't have the backup, so to his credit he soldiered on and was a rock at the back (most of the time). Wherever Ally was, Mitch was, well they work together, apparently.
Woody - Was heard to say during one of the games 'Put me on Schultzy and I'll unlock the defence'. 10 minutes into his appearance Schultz shouted 'Woody, I think you forgot the key'. Great Tour.
John - Youngest and by far the tallest person on the tour. I have never seen a bloke eat so much. Every night he'd have a starter, then a kilogram steak and pudding. He'd always polish off everyone else's dinner too. Was given a fine by the opposition after the last game as they thought he'd never played football football before, they were probably right.
Paul - Geordie, The driver of the other combi. Had a minor argument between the wall and the side of the van, but nothing major. Great tour as well.
Bully - First night crew member, unlike Jeff. Famous for his Indian dancing on the first night in Tiger Tiger. He didn't look out of place in there either.
Auzzy - Did a great job on the coaching and an even better job getting us all free tickets for the England match. Golf course blagger as well.
Koops - Nice guy. I won't forget the Final Fantasy IV T-shirt on a night out. He was always complimentary about the way I played football, which was very nice, but he's obviously mad or something.
Kush - Our Zimbabwean zulu centre forward and buyer of the now infamous shirt. Thanks Mate.
I thank you all for making me feel welcome even though I'm a civvy.
I think after the year we've had it was just what the doctor ordered. I was completely chilled out and laid back and forgot all my worries at home. That is of course until of course I landed back at Heathrow. The pace of life noticably increased and the pile of letters that greeted me on the doormat was a sure sign that I've still a little way to go to resolve all my 'issues'. Still not long till the RTW trip though.
There was one good bit of news on the doormat. Apparently I produce the 3rd best football programme in Southern League Eastern Divison, the 7th best in the Southern League and 44th best Non League Programme in the country. What an honour. All rise for the Non League Football Programme Editor extratrordinare. All done on a shoestring don't you know. Wonder who's doing it whilst I'm away. Ho Hum!!
